Driving Without a License

For those who don't want the full story, jog down to the end. The shortened version awaits...

Last week was a ‘low on funds’ kind of week. Friday was payday and I had been carrying around a $3.60 check from my pharmacy refunds. Thursday was the kind of day where I had the change at home and could have run by home to pick it up in order to get an end of the day refill on my pop crock. However, I was right by my credit union and thought, ‘I’ll cash this and that will get me through.’

So since I was close to my credit union I went ahead through the drive through. With the combined change from the check and what was in my account, I was even able to get $4 cash and leave some change in there. I sign the little receipt and hand both copies back to her, asking her to please shred my copy (I hate taking those receipts because they dirty up my car and they have account information on it which I think puts me financially in ‘concern’ if anyone ever breaks into my car – truth be told you can’t even access the permanent $25 that is in the account, and there is seldom more than that.) Back to the bank, the woman asks ‘oh, do you want this envelope?’ in regards to the envelope that they shove cash in – another thing I hate (waste of paper, trash in car.) So I say, ‘No, thanks for asking.’ I take my $4 and drive off.

When I am all the way across town and getting ready to go to my evening appointment, I realize that the woman never returned my driver’s license. So, I look up the number (yes, I am smart enough to carry a phone book in my car). It goes immediately to voicemail. Even though the drive-thru is open until 6 p.m., the rest of the building is not open after 5:30. I leave a message that it is frustrating not being able to reach someone, knowing there is someone in the building. I try calling the other branches. I leave another message. I start randomly entering numbers, trying to reach someone in their office. I call back and leave another message. I make sure this time to leave more than ‘I need to reach you, you kept my driver’s license.’

Finally I recognize that I can do nothing about it at this time. An additional frustrating part of this is that I ran over to the casino after my meeting. I had a free $5 coupon to play with and as long as you play for ½ hour, you can go and get a buffet dinner comped. I went over and that $5 allowed me to play for ½ hour, so I went up to get my free meal ticket – guess what? You need your driver’s license and your players card to get your free meal. That sucked.

I received a call at 9:03 and remember thinking that I should have brought the phone into the bathroom. I thought it was amusing that I was making a big deal about being able to reach them, and here I was after leaving several phone messages, not answering their call.

The first thing the bank manager says to me after I explain who I am – ‘did you find your driver’s license yet?’ Are you kidding me? I explained that I didn’t not have it and she said that they have looked ‘high and low’ and they also do not have it. I explained that this is part of why I was frustrated with not being able to reach anyone last night – I am sure it went to the person who came through the drive-thru after me. I explained all of the above and pointed out that I have been with this c.u. long enough I know that one of the first things they do is put that D.L. in the white envelope so they don’t forget. She asked me to check my car again.

I have to interject on how calm I played it on these calls. I did point out that I have searched ‘high and low’ and even though there is no way to prove it, I have a very good visual memory for stuff like this and I cannot picture getting my driver’s license back. Yep, I said that. So now on top of everything else, I sound like a loon.

She asked me to hold a couple of minutes while she checked to see how many transactions were after mine and to check the little white envelopes and make sure it was not still there. She came back to say there were only a few transactions and asked that I give her until noon to contact all of them to see if they have it. I thanked her and said I could wait.

At 2:30 I was done waiting – we were now getting close to the time when the DMV would close and I would have to go the whole weekend without a license if I didn’t hear something. She apologized, but she had reached everyone but the woman was served directly after me. She said she was an OPS employee and even though she has left messages, she was told she wouldn’t be able to call until school was out. She said she would call by 5:30 at the latest.

At 5:40 she gave me a call. She had never reached this woman. I again shared frustration that there should have been a way to reach someone last night. She said, ‘sir, she hasn’t returned my calls all day, what difference would last night have made.’ I explained that it would have been a 14 hour head start and that many of the teachers don’t check their mail boxes on a daily basis (although they are supposed to) and most of them turn off their cells during the day because they can’t get reception in the school for most of them anyway. She then went on to say that we would have to wait to hear from her until Monday. She went on to say that the person after that has their disconnected. I said, ‘you told me you had reached everyone but this one woman?’ She said, ‘well we attempted, but their phone is shut off, we didn’t have a way.’ I cut in and said, ‘then you send a letter which now, it is too late to go out in today’s mail.’ She simply stated that she hadn’t thought of that.

I said, ‘wait a minute, you are open half the day tomorrow and if the license shows up tomorrow, I want to know.’ She said she was off tomorrow and I pointed out that she needs to make someone aware of the situation. She said, ‘so and so, the woman who got all of your messages this morning is well aware of the situation and will be working tomorrow.’ I again shared my frustrations and she told me, ‘well not claiming any fault of ours or yours – because really you should check to make sure you have received your license back before you leave.’ I cut her off with a simply, ‘ma’am.’ She said, ‘I know, but… and went on to explain that if I had to get a replacement, they would reimburse me.’ But the fact was that I could still potentially go a full weekend without a license. She asked me again to check my car really good.

I explained to the friends I was with the situation – they were laughing and when I went to the bathroom I heard two things. ‘It’s always Bill, that this stuff happens to.’ and ‘have you every notice that he has a kidney the size of a squirrel.’ Nice, huh? When I came out I joked with them that they are right, but I do not have a kidney the size of a squirrel. They asked what I was talking about and said that they had simply said, ‘if it’s going to happen to anyone, it’ll happen to Bill.’ Not at all what I heard, but I do believe them because they looked like they had no idea what I was talking about.

The next morning at 9:30 I received a call from the bank – the woman who had been directly behind me had just dropped off my driver’s license. I thanked them and said I would be in before closing. It’s nice to be right, but funny enough the bank made no acknowledgement of this. I am still thinking of sending a letter expressing both a thank you for your efforts and a note of frustration.

That’s the story – now for those who need the shortened version: The bank forgot the return my driver’s license, it went to the woman who went through the drive-thru after me. I got it back on Saturday.