Enough to Hurt

This last week was one of those that had a lot of thought-provoking incidents. Some of them made me cry. When I say cry, for me it often means eyes welling up with tears - I don't like to have the big sobbing fits - they stuff up my head and I don't feel very well after them. I did have one of them though - when California overturned and claimed that not allowing same-sex couples to marry was unconstitutional. I'm getting teary-eyed thinking about it right now. It's funny, because it has been a long time since I have even been close to even the possibility of marriage and that was to a woman. I knew it was important, but I didn't expect it to impact me in the way I did. I sobbed, I sobbed when I read some of the celebratory blogs, I sobbed when Ellen announced her engagement to Portia, I sobbed at the thought of the possibility. Maybe, someday.

I watched this movie The Air that I Breathe - gotta admit that the trailer was better than the movie was. It was nice to see some of the actors I really like together: Sarah Michelle Gellar, Kevin Bacon, Brenden Fraiser and Al Pachino. The movie was not very good - too much going on in a story that - well, I think it tried to do the circular story thing which has become fairly popular with Babel and Crash. They didn't do it. But I did hear a couple of songs that I really liked. One had a chorus that just blew me away - "At least I loved enough to hurt," I love the thoughts a line like that brings to the surface. I am not going to go into the whole thing of whether I have or have not "loved enough to hurt," but I do love the way it has me thinking.

Grey's Anatomy made me cry, I love that show. It always does. I have to admit that I even got a little teary-eyed on an episode of Wife Swap when the wives re-connected with there spouses (surely some of these families have to know how fucking crazy they come across on this show?)I also got a little teary-eyed for Pam and Michael on The Office, as well as for Earl. I love those shows.

I stayed away from a couple of movies because I feared they are going to make me sob, though I am completely drawn to them. Grace Is Gone staring John Cusack and Rails and Ties staring Kevin Bacon. Look them up and you will see what I mean - I saw they previews and they both made me tear up. I also keep starting to watch Lars And The Real Girl - but I keep putting it in before I go to bed, which is just stupid as I really want to see this movie and have heard so much good about it.

On Friday I finished re-reading Prince Caspian in anticipation of the movie. I admit that the book make me well up a couple of times. But the movie, oh my goodness, the movie. It was beautiful. They change a couple of things from the book - I was really okay with that. The actual battle scene in the book was so short and anti-climatic, but the movie justifies it. The White Witch is back, and in the book she actual never returns (I am really not revealing spoilers since we see her in the previews). But the music and the look in these children's eyes, is so wonderful, that you are taken back to Narnia. I welled up more than once throughout the whole movie. It was beautiful. I wished as I was watching it that I had watched The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe before I went to see it, not because I missed anything by not doing that, but because I was reminded of the wonder and joy I felt in watching that movie. It will definitely be on my movies to watch this week.

So last night, I was trying to figure out what to watch before bed and decided that I am a big baby and I didn't want to end my weekend with another sad story - so I watched the country music awards and headed off to bed. This week is a week full of season finales, hopefully some movies, but definitely writing. I can't believe I spent the whole weekend only typing one line - I really have nothing to show for what I did instead, except a little planting. I did get a rejection from one of the publishers I sent my manuscript to - it's a little frustrating as it wasn't even opened - just had a big "REJECTED" sticker on the front, although when I checked the Writer's Market, it does say that picture books are supposed to be submitted with the full manuscript?